See at appropriate point below.

I'd decided to use my cell-phone as an alarm clock this morning. I was woken up a few times by this and that. The highlight was hearing from Rachel, because I figured her phone had been disconnected. And it had been, but then she moved and got a new one. I was so out of it the conversation lasted for 7 minutes. I think she took pity and said she'd ring me later. I fell back into a coma.

I was woken up around 11:30am by either Bugwee, Nick's giant cat (aka 'Atlas of fatness'), or something else. Between then and 2, I read about 30 pages of an S&M book Tania gave me 1 or 2 nights ago and edited photographs. The Tania episode deserves a good paragraph. Suffice it to say that: 1) I went alone since Nick was narcoleptically unconscious elsewhere; 2) Yes, I could've; 3) No, I didn't.

I decided to rouse Nicholas at 2pm so we could head over to the Detroit Institute of Arts. Unfortunately, he learned today that they were renovating. They had a few new exhibits open that were tour guide only. Neither one of us like that style. And I sure as hell don't like paying 18 bucks for the two of us to see just Rodan and another Famous Dead White Dude.

So the rest of the afternoon and evening passed into obscurity. Nick had offered to go out with me to do some photography, but instead he fell asleep. Steven is supposed to come by, pick him up, take him back to his place, cook, talk, and then take Nick to probation at 7am tomorrow. I'd hoped I could just drop Nicholas off later, but Steven wants some close time with him.

Naturally this situation has made Phillip, Nick's boyfriend, skittish and passive-aggressive. He's been a prissy drama-whore most of the time I've been here. Every conversation the three of us have in person or he has over the phone with Nick has to include, in some fashion, a veiled or direct accusation that Nick and Steven are playing bedroom baseball. The dude says no, I know he doesn't lie about that shit, and Phil just keeps on going every single time.

One good example was last night. Nicholas and I were doing a photo shoot near 'crackhead central'. Nick is on the phone with Phil during this, which makes sense since: 1) he'd have been bored otherwise; 2) in case bad shit went down, Phil could call the cops and give our coordinates.

One burned out abandoned house and neary industrial stuff later, we're headed to eastern market. But suddenly Phil gets, I assume, selfish jealous and blah blah blah. Suddenly we're meeting him at a McDonald's. It's one of those relationship things. To quote Phil as he smiled at me with Nick in the other car, "It's love! L-o-v-e." Tell that to my vacation, you selfish twat.

He wasn't being snide, and he in himself isn't a whiny unnecessarily jealous bitchy passive-aggressive selfish prissy dickhead. He just gets that way when Steven comes up, which in his mind is every conversation. I swear to Christ I am fucking sick of it. It ruined a few good sections of my vacation (as amusing as it was the first 1 or 2 times). I can understand wanting to spend time with your lover. Been there, done that, left the flaming car still walking. However I see Nicholas once a year.

So after we drove back to Nicholas' place, I good-naturedly figured I'd give them some alone time to talk or do whatever. I ended up around the local hospital around 4am. I'd set up shop at one location, flick my right hand out to adjust some stuff, quickly stuff it back in my glove, rub vigorously, lather rinse repeat. You'll see some of the stuff later.

As you can tell, I'm not at all happy.

I wish I could stay longer, though, since Nicholas, myself, and occasionally others (even including Phil) had fun drinking or carrousing. But I have to head back, grade some late student's exam I'd forgotten in the general bullshit mayhem of finals grading, and start working again.

Actually I started working again a few hours ago, just out of boredom and temporary depression.

I need to get something to eat soon. It isn't a sign of stable mental health when the increasingly 'best' idea for a night out is walking along Woodward, going back to the burnt out abandoned house, and communing with shit you wouldn't likely believe me about. It is a temptation. But food will restore my common sense and I'll just edit photography or read or whatever.

Phil wanted to go out and photograph with me later on (sans Nicholas, unfortunately). I may be angry at him for stepping on some of my plans, but I do still like the guy. Still, I'm not in the mood to try making conversation and seeming more content or with it than I actually am.

I'd prefer to spend time with silence for my last night in Detroit this time around.

But I've reached enough of a catharsis to go from very sad to mildly pissed off, so I'll take it.

More detail about the trip later.

(Later that night)

I woke up Nick around 7:30pm. For some reason, Steven seemed suddenly antagonistic toward Nick over the phone. Nick kept texting and phoning back, but no dice. I decided to go to Union St. for some food and asked Nick to come (since I still figured Steven would pick him up and cook for him later). The food helped me feel more stable. Not exactly better, but stable. Phil and I ended up talking over the phone while Steven called Nick back. Basically I tried to help Phil feel better about some shit that's been stressing him out. Yeah I'm still pissed off at him, but it seemed like he needed the ear and some hopefully useful information. The thing with Steven driving is off, so I'll be getting up circa 6am (energy drink in tow) to take Nick to get some cleansing stuff and then to probation. After that, dunno, probably read. Nick and Phil would like me to stay a day, but a few factors make me think I should jet: 1) Cost of trip. 2) Needing to get back to take care of a student's grade I screwed up on (given that I said I'd be coming back on the 7th). 3) Even if my advisor is away this coming week, I need to make sure fellowship crap is in a line, as well as make graphs of the 70 or so significant results I have. I'd say I'm about 1/2 finished. 4) It feels like a good time to go.

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