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Go me 2006-12-06 - 5:09 a.m. 
I set my alarm for 6:50Went to bed at 11:45 By all accounts, I haven't slept at all By insomnia's extension, I may well have fucked myself. Again. And in the wee hours beyond thinking of nothing, beating the shit out of myself mentally, or trying lovey-dovey horseshit, I keep thinking about two people who don't deserve to be thought about. Who I wish I could cut out of my memory with a swift smack to a wall. Or some drug induced purifying tirade. Most of all, I wish I didn't subconsciously or whateverconsciously decide to fuck myself when my life is more than capable of supplying the dick. Well I've got another hour and a half to try sleeping. Then it's a timed draw, studying, class with the boring Englishman, more studying, more class, then studying until I can't goddamn well study anymore. Maybe I'll be able to do all this. Maybe some of it. The point is I needed to do all of this well. But I failed myself. Go me. |
