I've never felt like more of a fool than doing online job searches. Besides a few white collar odd jobs in sales, offices and a library, I've only done research. How do you make 3+ years of making experiments and drugging rats 'market-savvy'? And could I be a "bubbly go-getter team player with excellent communication and excellent writing skills who works independently and can meet deadlines with an award-winning attitude"?

Yes. I could. Unfortunately, you need actual job experience to land even an entry level position in, say, data entry or something as complex as office assistance. I thought about medical lab technician jobs, but they require all of these state and federal certifications I've never heard of and that I don't have the time to pursue.

So I said fuck it to them and started looking for local part-time jobs as a research technician (read: glorified stock-boy and repairman). It's funny, but I found a few really nice Biotech. jobs over by Gran's house in Woodland Hills. Going back there to live and work isn't an option, however. There also seem to be some choice animal handler jobs in San Francisco and San Diego, but not anything in-between (i.e. here).

But then, the clouds/seas/legs/lips parted, and there it was. I was surprised and really excited to see a technician/researcher opening over at the University of Southern California. They want a part-time person to come in on weekends, lead undergrads. by the nose to get them involved and make sure the place is stocked and clean. It's a simple job and only an hour away.

Something confuses me, though. The job advertisement said the lab does "general medical" research. Well, I've technically done general medical stuff...but is my stuff different from their stuff? If so, by how much? In any case, I feel confident I can get the job.

In other news, I drove down the hill today to buy fast food. Remarkable? Not really, except for the unexpected lunch guest right by my parked car (since I wanted to eat in the sun). He was short, about 8 inches, black all over and with a tappered bill. Most crows don't bother with humans. This young one, however, kept starring at me. I blinked, he blinked. He'd squat and caw three times at my left rear tire now and then. He kept this up for awhile before stepping closer. I thought he'd entertained me pretty well for the last 15 minutes, so I tossed him some nutrient-enriched hot dog bun. Last I saw he was scoping out my car's butt.

Now if I were a ham, I'd wonder why it was so easy for a crow to get dough, so why can't I? But really, he and I aren't all that different. We live off of handouts. All I need is a lovely funding agency to throw more money at some local scientists in my field..and then boom, more part-time research positions.

I could use some magic like that.

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