In the wide world of academia I had another article to read for class today. It was a review article about how our hormone, immune and brain systems seem to like screwing with one another to get us to a balanced state of being (i.e. homeostasis). It covered all--and I mean ALL--the underlying mechanisms for these interactions.

So yeah, I started yesterday. Yeah, it was a hell of alot more difficult than what I originally thought; imagine gnawing on cardboard that has the consistency of sandpaper with a heady aftertaste; it was an acquired aftertaste.

I'd read the whole thing by 2am this morning, but I was too delirious and couldn't give enough of a damn to write the 2 page summary/application paper into the wee morning hours.

So here was my dilemma: I had class at 2pm and I had no idea how much time writing this paper would take. I emailed in and said I'd be in at 12:30, make up for the (volunteer) hours later. I set my alarm for 9:30 thinking I could write the thing in two hours. My body knew me better than that and woke my ass up at 7:30. By 8:00 I had techno tracks from 'Deus Ex' repeating while jargon and transitional phrases flew out my ass like those demons in Disney's Night on Bald Mountain with the gargantuan grinning demon lord.

I got out all the ass demons for the summary part by 11:20; I just needed the "how could this impact our field?" bit at the end. Nothing inspired me during my drive to Mt. University or while trying to find side-street apartment parking.

At 1:00 I was still sitting and thinking about what to write. Then, suddenly, the mists cleared and I saw a cheap shot. The authors had covered damn near every brain, immune and hormone chemical...but not all of them. Well by God we needed to study ALL of them! Let the hills ring with the interaction effects! So by 1:30 I had farted out the last half page. That left another 30 minutes to get lunch, print the thing, wolf lunch down, edit the thing, try to print the edited thing again and threaten the printer, actually print the edited thing and get up to class.

One minor problem: the paper was due next week, not this week.

I didn't have much time to feel sheepish, though, since class was heavy today. We went through the historical evolution of different learning theories in ratsies; not as easy as it sounds, but I followed most of it (as well as anyone could over a 3 hour lecture). Afterwards, I got back a more than satisfactory paper back from Dr. Zivago and talked with him about the write-up I'm doing.

When he finally left for the day I decided that only working on the write-up at Mt. University wasn't efficient. Afterall, I came in on some days just to jerk off (metaphorically) into Microsoft Word, whereas I could have been doing that at my place in a bathrobe with some perrier.

All I needed for this master plan was to photocopy several pages from this huge blue folders of experiments. Now, technically, taking a folder like this out of the lab is against federal and local laws, but Dr. Ziv had gone home for the day, noone else was around and none of the photocopiers in the psychology building take copycards (archaic pieces of plastic fluff). So, three unconfirmed misdemeanors and a class B felony later, I had my photocopies.

And lest I forget, I'm going to see the good captain tomorrow, who has spring break from plundering education articles and raping literature.

Finally, passing thought: sometimes in the morning I miss the physical comfort of being next to someone, with coccaine hands just inches from me, eyes closed and lips open. It passes off after I get out of bed, fortunately, but it still occurs to me from time to time.

I think too much in bed.

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