What surprised me were the number of people there. We had 14 new and bubbly undergraduates. 14. I was expecting 7. With our old flock this gives us enough to have a broadcastable protest on TV! And so I looked at Zivago and smiled, commented and did the usual, but one question kept coming to mind: does Dr. Ziv know something I don't know, or is he as in the dark as I am about how everyone will do 7-12 hours of work a week (which he "requires")? Ok, so they've gotta get certified, that takes a month, great. But we gots no bankroll. Our gravy train ain't come in.

About the closest we've got is a sour cream and chives train on account of Midget. Midget had won a decent sized undergraduate award last quarter, which snagged the lab some funding--not enough for me but hopefully just enough for us to do some direct drug-to-brain work. The National Science Foundation wants some initial results before it backs us, you see, and damn but it'd be nice for me to get a salary. I loves me some government money.

If we can get those supplies, then, it'll start looking like a surgery farm around the lab. I could bring in my stereo system and torture people with trance techno and speed metal--and they'd have to put up with it too. There are advantages to being senior research guy.

So maybe we'll keep the undergrads busy by having lots of practice surgeries. Now I don't like the idea of doing more shit on top of what I've got already...but Ziv promised me that I could have next week and up to tuesday of the week after that off. The General GRE is the most important. The psychology GRE afterward can be useful, but only one of the places I'm looking at requires it.

Speaking of graduate school, I finally got to broach the subject with Dr. Zivago. He didn't give me the answers I was looking for like 'you'll do fine, you're a shoe-in anyway' or something like that. Instead he gave me 'well, figure it this way: you try your best and you either get in or you don't.' Good, sound advice, I agree with you. However, I'd hoped I'd get something slightly more encouraging--considering I've been working for the lab since february.

Which got me to thinking that there's a possibility I might get rejected from all the grad schools I apply to. It's a reasonable chance in this day and age. I'm not sure what I'd do after something like that..but then I should start thinking about that when I need to.

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My happy note of the day is that I got my ADHD medication in the mail two weeks early. I think this stuff'll help alot, especially with the math section. I seem to miss a question either because I didn't read it thoroughly or mistook one thing to mean something else.

14 more days of studying. It's like a rollercoaster of calm and fear. Can I be ready? Will I be ready? Can I achieve what basically amounts to aceing the general GRE test?

No idea. Bah.

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