I didn't expect I would summon the Infernal Lord of Hell himself. As I was typing suddenly the AOL startup screen came up. Snorting, I closed the thing. A few minutes later, it came up again..and every time I cut the program short, it came back again..repeatedly, continuously, like some satanic cabaret.

Then I heard a voice:

"mrow latrom noinim ym denommus uoy evah yhw?"

It wouldn't stop! It scratched against my ears, mind reeling at seeing AOL starting again and again. I left it open hoping it would sleep. Then, suddenly where my connection worked before, it denied me and asked for AOL. My protocol had been corrupted by the Infernal One and been made to serve him.

A low laugh filled the room, reveling in its new power. "No!," I harshly whispered, "you already work Windows, you will not claim everything here! I command you, leave!" I tried reciting a few biblical quotes, but AOL just kept coming up. He was mocking me and the holy book of demonic slapdown.

I then pulled forth a dusty, unused Linux manual and begin to read. It made no sense to me, but I had to try. The room quaked and a low beep screamed throughout, my computer crashing in a fiery blue screen of death. I rebooted and continued to read aloud in a steady voice. Then, as I logged in, lo, the demon had vanished! I was victorious!

Now Satan only runs my operating system and that's the way it should be.

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