Yowl, yowl, screech, really big yowl, grinding noise of something expensive dropping onto cement.

I grunted and stood up in the bleary darkness, tip-toeing around the clothes and carpet. I picked up the miniature squirt gun that lounged on the plastic rack bolted to the hall. I knew how to handle my cats.

It was cold outside; I was naked; it vaguely made sense at the time. There they were ready to pounce each other, the small stark white siamese and the 40 pound morbidly obese persian. I squirted the persian into waddling away, but the other ducked and hid in our driveway's stained glass table. I walked up the steps and into my bed, blinked, grunted and laid down again.

More yowls.

Grunt, squirt gun, walk to back, squirt both cats, pasty white arse scintillating like only a pasty white arse can against the moon and star light. The siamese looks up and mews suddenly. As usual he's the one that started it, but he's adorable and pathetic. I pick him up with squirt gun between teeth, put him in mom's room, lay back down in bed.

All three of us repeated this naked Kabuki opera three more times. The sun and I said hi.

---

Squirting cats at dawn aside, I've been having extreme jaw and mouth pain over the last few days. My second wisdom tooth has suddenly jutted out right up against my cheek. I can't open my jaw much or chew well, since the edge of the tooth grinds into my skin and lacerates the coldsore already there. I'm getting up at 10 tomorrow morning (don't look too shocked) to get it xrayed and get referred to an oral surgeon. Knowing the last wisdom tooth, this one is impacted on top of growing sideways. It took four hours and 6 full shots of anaesthesia last time. I ate shakes for 2 weeks. They don't know it yet, but whichever surgeon I get referred to will be knocking me out.

I've been waiting to hear back from my old professors or the job prospect prof., anyone I could have sworn I sent emails to half a week ago. Yowl. Nothing. I figure I'll wait a few more days before politely lying that hotmail has been acting up and asking them if they received these emails I'd sent.

Haven't been in the mood to write or talk lately. I'm tired and uninspired. Haven't finished that review for Masochism Avenue yet, but I did subscribe to Writer's Market, which gave me alot of good ideas about what sorts of magazines I could do freelance work for.

Yowl. Grunt. Bedamned sodden tooth.

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